Double your family, double your fun~~~!

Warsaw, Poland – June 13 to June 16, 2004

The good news about the ride to Warsaw was that, since it was a Sunday, heavy trucking is not allowed on Polish roads. So, it took less time than expected. At Cestawowa, Elaine moved to Jozef’s car and I moved to the van. As we approached Warsaw, I was talking about how the Marriott was one of the easiest to spot buildings in the city. It is 40 stories tall, across from the central train station, and right in the middle of the city. Floors 4 through 20 are the headquarters of LOT, the national airline of Poland. As we got on the street that would lead us straight to it, I pointed and showed Joyce where it was. At that exact moment, the driver chose to turn off the road to stop the van and ask people where the Marriott was. This ten-minute detour wasn’t too bad. Finally, another cabbie pointed our driver in the right direction.

On the early part of the drive, I had been riding with Jozef when he had to stop to fuel his car. Frankly, there is very little as boring as sitting in the car while somebody else goes to fuel it. I went to say something to the boys, but could not get their attention. They were transfixed. They had never seen a car fueled before. At that moment, I was having second thoughts about having booked us in to such a large hotel. Kids who thought putting gas in the car was interesting were going to be overwhelmed with life on the 32nd floor.

We quickly discovered that they had never ridden in an elevator before. The elevators in the Marriott are very fast. “M” really did not like riding in these. However, we found that they were not really overwhelmed by the hotel, as I had feared. They loved the view from the room windows and particularly loved the swimming pool.

The pool is beautiful. We also had a great bit of luck. The lifeguard that was working on Monday afternoon is a young man who is going to college to be a physical education teacher. He saw that we had our hands full with three children who cannot swim and he jumped in to give the children swimming lessons. Each day he would spend the better part of an hour working with the kids. They all made astounding progress. “I” can now swim in the deep end with only little arm floats.

While swimming, the kids were constantly shadowed by Ross. Ross was amazing! At one point, I was trying to show “M” that he had to hold on to something to swim. He was fighting me. So, I intentionally let him fall into the water to communicate. Well, the lesson failed. As soon as he fell in, Ross zoomed to the rescue and grabbed him. It was impressive how quickly Ross swam to the rescue. Often, the lifeguard would have one kid in the deep end and Ross and I would have another. Ross swam countless laps protecting the kids.

Ross also has been good about holding their hands, keeping them from the elevator doors, pushing the stroller with “M” in it, buckling little “D” in her car seat (he even helped make the proper adjustments to it), fixing “M’s” sandals, buying them chips, helping them get ready for the pool, and tons of other stuff. This trip would have been much more difficult without the big brother along.

One night, Ross and I went to the pool for an additional swim after the little kids went to sleep. It was fun. It is cool that Ross stays up later than they do. We can still hang out alone sometimes.

Oh, something that I may have forgotten to mention earlier. On Saturday, Ross beat me at chess. The little rascal actually clobbered me. He had never beaten me before, but has been studying. It shows. He wants you all to know that he clobbered me with the queen backed up by the bishop.

On Monday, we took the kids to see the embassy-approved doctor. That all went smoothly. Afterwards, Jozef and Elaine went to the Ministry of the Interior to get the passports. Funny, but it took longer to pick them up than it had to apply for them.

On Tuesday, we went to the American Consulate. This was the big appointment of the whole trip. We had an appointment, but that is not as quick as it sounds. Don’t get me wrong. We walked past very long lines of people because of the appointment, but this was not an in and out deal. Without the visas from the American government, we don’t get to go home.

Jozef picked us up at 9:00 A.M. Before the Consulate, we had to get photos of the children taken for official documents. These have to be in a style that the U.S. accepts. There is a little shop nearby that does it right. The children were cooperative and the woman doing it was cheerful and quick. When the photos were ready, we headed to the Consulate.

At the Consulate, there was a huge line of people to one side of the sidewalk. We went to a different door and went right in. After security, we started by presenting our paperwork and Jozef is allowed to help with this part. Then, off to another window to pay the visa fee. Then, wait. Wait in a very crowded waiting room with three small children. Wait for our interview with a consular official. The official must see the children. So, the children must wait. I expected this to be at the U.S. Embassy and not at the Consulate. I expected this to be in conducted in offices. It was more like the Registry of Motor Vehicles or an extremely busy bank.

We were getting nervous because families that arrived after us were being called before us. Granted, they were only adopting one child each, but Jozef said he could not understand why it was taking so long. Good that Elaine had packed toys for the children.

The consular official was a young American man who was stunned that we had adopted three children. Stunned. Later, Jozef told us that he must be new because sets of three are pretty common. Jozef was not allowed to help with the interview. We had to show the children to the official and then one of us could stay for the interview. “M” would not go without his backpack. So, I wound up carrying him with his half open backpack and the little toy he was playing with. It was funny.

Gliwice to Warsaw, Poland – June 12 – 13, 2004

This is Lawrence.

When the children are in a routine, they are well behaved and even-tempered. Well, I am guessing having a mother, father, big brother, and grandmother come to the orphanage and take you home forever is an exceptional day.

After leaving the children’s home we headed to the Hotel Sylvia. The children recognized it straight away. They call it the little house because they know that we don’t really live there. They were happy to see it.

As soon as we got out of the cars, the kids were bouncing off the walls. Happy is not a strong enough term to describe their utter joy. Glee, bliss, and better than average are all terms that can’t help us here. They were simply ga-ga. It showed.

Elaine and Ross had tried to arrange the suite as it appeared when last we were there and got out the suitcase of toys, crayons, and art supplies that we have for them – the stuff they are used to. We wanted as much as possible to give them the familiar and, hopefully, a routine they knew. It sort of worked and it sort of didn’t. Not sure that anything would have kept them from being completely goofy the afternoon of June 12th. “I” even climbed the door casing. Don’t ask me how. He just did.

We ate, we played, we watched “Casper the Friendly Ghost” shorts in Polish, we went outside and ran around. They loved it all. At about 6:00, Danuta and her daughter came to visit us. It was a lovely visit. Danuta’s daughter may spend six weeks with us this summer. She is 18 and very good with the children. Poland, like other eastern European countries, start their children in school a year later that the US, so this is her summer between Junior and Senior years of High School. So, it would be a big help in the transition if she gets the visa. However, if she does come, it won’t be until mid July. Until that time, we will be asking people like Ania, Sophia (Ania’s daughter), and other folks that Elaine and her mother know that “moo-veetch” the “Popolsckul” to help us with things like doctor and dentist appointments.

So, for our first family meal together, there were nine of us for dinner. There was a big wedding reception at the Silva that night which added to the children’s disruption of routine. Even their Hotel Silvia routine was broken. It was a very happy and raucous reception. It was loud.

We enjoyed our dinner and visit with our guests. Grammy actually got each child bathed and ready for bed. So, right away they know that Joyce is there for them. It was particularly bonding with “M”. You have got to love the way she just knows what to do and then does it. If Joyce is at breakfast when “M” wakes, he asks for her. Anyway, the children had quite a day and went to bed almost an hour later than usual. The suite has a sort of entry hall that gives it a double door. This was good since the wedding reception was growing louder and louder. They were not really rude, but not quiet either. However, the kids heard none of it.

The next morning our three little alarm clocks went off early – earlier than the breakfast buffet was ready. At the Silvia, breakfast is served at 6:00 AM, Monday through Saturday and at 6:30 AM on Sunday. Well, these start times are more estimates than actual start times. Particularly since the wedding reception took all of the hotel’s resources, (for example, we had no pillows because we gave ours to the children), the hotel staff were behind themselves.

Finally, breakfast was ready and we went down to the restaurant in shifts. Funny, but we are now used to the food at the Silvia. It was nice to be there – quirks and all. About 10:00 AM, the wedding guests were gathering for breakfast and we went out to play. We were scheduled to leave at Noon.

The driver returned at 11:30, but we were going nowhere without Jozef. See, the van has seats for nine passengers and a driver. However, it doesn’t have seatbelts for all of these places. The driver had tried to tell us that it was a limitation of the van’s design, but this was untrue. The middle seats had anchors for the seatbelts, but no seatbelts. The driver had tried to put one of the child car seats in a place where there was no seatbelt. He got upset with us when we insisted that ALL members of our party be buckled in. He tried to tell us that he has a three year-old son and therefore was an expert in these matters. NOT! Elaine decided to put “M” and “I” in the back of Jozef’s car. That solved the problem and made the driver huffy. This also gave us room to spread out between two cars.

Along the road we stopped at the McDonalds in Chestawowa. I think that more people visit this than the shrine. It took a while, but we made it Warsaw. The driver has trouble finding a 40 story building in middle of city across from central train station, but he finally did. It occurred to me that booking us into a hotel where you stay on the 32nd floor, may have been an interesting choice. More about that later. I have to go now.

Krakow and Gliwice, Poland – June 11 to 12, 2004

This is Lawrence.

When you last heard from us, we were in Krakow waiting for paperwork to be finished and trying to rest a bit. On our last day there, we visited Saint Mary’s church (which took almost 300 years to build), the Cloth Hall, and Market Square. However, we spent much of the day resting and packing.

Jozef told us that Jarrik would pick us up at 9:00 on Saturday. At 9:30, a guy named Jarrik arrived, but it was not the one who had driven for us on the previous trip. Frankly, we were disappointed…this Jarrik was no Jarrik. The first Jarrik had given us such great service that we were truly looking forward to seeing him again. Still, a ride is a ride and his van is big by Polish standards. So, off we set for Gliwice and the Hotel Silvia.

We arrived at the Silvia at about 11:45 and I hauled all the luggage upstairs. (I cannot complain of lack of exercise that day.) Ross helped me move luggage and helped Elaine move furniture so that the suite looked like the children remembered. What a great help he has been!

We changed to go get the children from the home. We had not seen them in several weeks and were eager to be reunited with them. Joyce, Ross, Elaine, and I piled into Jozef’s car and drove to the children’s home. This time they opened the big gate for Jozef to drive in.

This time we were brought to a room in the front building where we had never been before. Sister Stephania was very impressed with Ross and frankly he was impressive. He said; “good day, Sister” in Polish. She commented on what a handsome boy he is and brushed his cheek. He comported himself very well. We had told him that the nuns would look at him as a way of predicting the future of the three younger children. They seemed to really like what they saw.

After we did some legal paperwork, delivered a letter to Sister from Jackie in Michigan, and presented our donations to the home, Sister Stephania went off to get the children and bring them to us. She had told Jozef that they had been waiting by the door since noon. It seemed like a long time for her to go get children who were supposedly standing right behind the door, but my sense of time at that moment may not be that accurate. We could see their group playing outside but not “M”. Heck, all I had had since breakfast was a cup of tea. Anyone who knows me will tell you that I usually eat regardless of what is happening. But, today I was just too excited.

The children came in and ran to hug Elaine and I. Joyce and Ross sat in the background until the children had greeted us. The children looked great. Little “D” was wearing the outfit that we bought her. That was touching. There were smiles and hugs all around. We picked them up one and two at a time. “I” had that ‘I just won the lottery’ look.

Then we introduced them to Ross and Joyce. Everybody got along from the start. It is really hard to explain how happy we all were at that moment. So, I won’t try. You’ll just have to believe me.

Elaine had packed some wonderful clothes and shoes for the children. It was difficult to know exactly what size they would be. So, we brought two sizes of sandals and sneakers for each child. Little “D’s” sandals light up. I think that it will be snowing before we can get her to wear anything else. She thought that she only was getting one pair and had to choose between them. Joyce convinced her to try on the sneakers too. We are still not sure that she gets that they both belong to her. Wait until she gets a view of the dresser and closet at home.

We changed each of the children into clothes that we brought for them. Some of the boy’s clothes were ones that Ross and his cousins have worn. So, it was just so special to see them again on these boys. They liked their new clothes very much.

We had wished to give Ross and Joyce a tour of the children’s home and to take some pictures. Sister waited until the rest of the children were outside playing to do this. She was very careful to not let any of the other children see us.

Finally, it was time to go. We were very disappointed to learn that Sister Francescia – who is their primary care taker, was away for the weekend taking exams for her Master’s degree. In many ways, she has been like a mother to them and was not there when it was time for them to leave. Perhaps it was better that way.

Jozef had a cab waiting. Joyce and Ross took the cab and Elaine, the smaller kids, and I got in Jozef’s car and we drove away from the home. Children have trouble seeing anything but what is in front of them and on the ride to the Hotel Silvia, they dwelled on their disappointment that they didn’t get to ride in the taxi and corrected my pronunciation of the Polish word for taxi. It was good to be back together again. It seemed like old times.

We've got them, we've got their visas, and we can't wait to get home. More details when we have more than 5 seconds to write. But we didn't want to leave you hanging any more.

Elaine

Krakow, Poland – June 10, 2004

This is Lawrence

Poland really is a Catholic country. Today is the Feast of Corpus Christi and therefore a national holiday. Frankly, this feast goes mostly unnoticed by American Catholics and most Americans have never heard of it and may wonder why a feast day is named for a city in Texas. Poland is NOT America. We figured that the shops at the Cloth Hall would be open for the tourists, but only places to buy food were open. That’s it.

The hotel is packed mostly with people traveling on tour busses. We were very happy to have had breakfast before the majority of them sprang to action. After breakfast, we went for a very nice walk along cobblestone streets and were not surprised that none of the shops were open. We saw many nicely dressed people streaming towards the Market Square. Many of these were groups of nuns in habits of several different colors and styles.

In addition, there is some VIP staying at the Sheraton. This has shut down some of the streets and there are Police officers everywhere. So, I figured that this was about the best time possible to get cash from the ATM. Everywhere you could see at least four policemen. Might as well take advantage of the situation.

Around 9:30, we caught a taxi up to the Market Square area that includes the Cloth Hall and Saint Mary’s church. When we had visited this area on the Feast of Saint Stanislaus it was packed with people. You may remember that “M” was so freaked out that he kept climbing Lawrence like a tree. Therefore, we were pleased to see far fewer people today. Unlike the previous visit, all of the stores and shops were closed. We went on a 30-minute sightseeing tour via horse and carriage and when we returned to the square, we were amazed to see that thousands and thousands of people had arrived for religious services while we were gone. Nuns, novices, brothers, and priests numbered over 1,000 of this crowd. I couldn’t help but wonder if there were more nuns in that square today than in the whole of America. We enjoyed watching the festival and being part of it.

This whole thing would be like Quincy Market and Government Center in Boston filling up with Catholics on a Thursday to celebrate a feast day. Imagine all of the stores, offices, and schools closing. Poland is a country united by its religion. We only have such crowds gather if one of our sports teams wins something.

We had a leisurely lunch of pizza (not a Polish specialty), found a good Internet café, and did a little more sightseeing. There was a movie theatre and we had hoped to see the new Harry Potter movie, figuring that it would be in English with Polish sub-titles. However, we were told that it is in Polish. If we had already seen it, we may have gone to see it again, but we skipped it and headed back to the hotel. I think that the huge crowds tired us out.

As we re-charge our batteries for the second half of this trip, I cannot tell you how wonderful it has been to have the hotel pool at our disposal. Ross will stay in a pool as long as you let him. He just doesn’t seem to ever tire of it. We let him stay in for well over an hour today. He loved it and we all needed it.

Other than playing chess, having dinner, studying our language books, and writing, we really didn’t do much for the rest of the day. It seems that we are still more tired than I wish we were at this point. I am hopeful that we are feeling more energetic by the time we pick up the children on Saturday. Although we are waiting in a nice place, waiting is what we are doing. We are waiting for the passports and court papers to be ready. However, that day is coming and we are only a week away from home.

We won’t be able to post again until late Sunday night (Polish time) about our reunion with the children. We know that you are all eager to hear about that and what happens when the children meet their new drugi brat and Babchi Grammy. We are quite eager to experience it ourselves.

This is Ross.

We are at an Internet Cafe in Krakow. This is near the Market Square.

Yesterday we spent the whole day at Wawel Castle (pronounced Vavel). We saw the state rooms, the private apartments, and the armory. We liked the armory best because it had many swords, pikes, and cannons.

It was a lot of walking up very big hills. Before the age of gun powder this was an outstanding location for a castle. I could have defended it with a pack of cub scouts. I think that the kings made a mistake of moving the capital to Warsaw. I like Warsaw, but this is an amazing castle. I never would have left.

It is situated on a river which made it easy to re-supply and for royal barges to move.

See you later

Ross

This is Ross.

We are at an Internet Cafe in Krakow. This is near the Market Square.

Yesterday we spent the whole day at Wawel Castle (pronounced Vavel). We saw the state rooms, the private apartments, and the armory. We liked the armory best because it had many swords, pikes, and cannons.

It was a lot of walking up very big hills. Before the age of gun powder this was an outstanding location for a castle. I could have defended it with a pack of cub scouts. I think that the kings made a mistake of moving the capital to Warsaw. I like Warsaw, but this is an amazing castle. I never would have left.

It is situated on a river which made it easy to re-supply and for royal barges to move.

See you later

Ross and Lawrence

Warsaw to Krakow, Poland – Tuesday, June 8, 2004

After our visit to the Ministry, Jozef brought us back to the hotel to checkout. Elaine’s suitcase chose this moment to explode. The seam that attaches the zipper to the suitcase looks double-stitched but isn’t. Of course, Jozef is parked in the ten minute spot in front of the hotel and we have a train to catch, but she removed some items from her back and put it into to one of the Gliwice bound bags. Then we put it back together with a luggage strap from one of the bigger suitcases and that worked.

In his car, Jozef took the four suitcases that we don’t need until Gliwice. This is the stuff for our kids, the stroller that “Ciotka” Susan loaned us, and the children’s clothing that we will donate to the orphanage. (Lots of non-pink boy pants!). He will stow them at the Hotel Silvia tomorrow for us to retrieve on Saturday. This lightened our load considerably.

Jozef then shepherded us onto our train to Krakow. Since he had taken away half the luggage, this was now the easiest and fastest way to travel. The train station is within sight of the Novatel and right across the street from the Marriott at which we will be staying later in the trip. However, I am still very glad that he was with us. We bought first-class tickets to Krakow. (All of the tour books tell you to buy the first-class tickets on Polish trains. The price was not that much more and I am glad that we did.) There was a drunk old, toothless, unshaven guy with a porter’s cart who kept trying to transport our luggage for us. Jozef went back and got a much better porter for us. The sketchy guy muttered in Polish that we were “denying a good man his day’s work”. That Joyce could translate for us. The porter that Jozef found was much better.

First-class on the train has assigned seats in nice compartments. The compartments hold six people and we had a Polish businessman traveling with us. The train gives you the chance to stretch out, walk around, eat, and just relax much more than a car ride would have. It also took less than half the time of a car ride and cost less too. They even have a drink and snack cart that comes along to serve you refreshments that were tasty. We told Ross that it was like the train that Harry Potter rides to Hogwarts. There are also hot meals that you can order from the dining car. Elaine and Joyce shared an expensive but tasty kurak fillet. We arrived in Krakow none the worse for wear.

In Krakow, the twin brother of the drunken porter from Warsaw was posing as a cabbie who was harassing us for our business. We were told by a railroad official at the station that we had to go up a flight for the taxis, but the elevator only goes down. I was not looking forward to hauling the luggage up the stairs. Before we knew it, this sketchy guy jumps in the elevator and tries to take us to his cab. Ross and I were on the ride downstairs and a Polish man standing behind me in the elevator whispered to me that “the real taxis are Upstairs”. So, I would not go with the sketchy cabbie nor let him take our bags. The Polish man stayed during this and a nice Canadian fellow heard what was going on and came over to offer assistance. When Elaine and Joyce joined us, I told this fake taxi driver to beat it. However, we were now on the wrong level to get a cab.

I felt a bit stupid for having stumbled into this situation, but the signs to the taxi showed an up arrow and stairs. Even without the bags that Jozef took to Gliwice, we are traveling heavy. The train official messed me up by telling me to take an elevator that simply DOES NOT go up a level.

All of the travel books warn and warn again about these fake taxi drivers that try to pounce on you at the airport, train station, and other places. They are not taxi drivers. They are guys with cars. Not licensed, with no meters, and possible Mafia connections – these are guys you want to avoid. Until this point, I had done well.

We found a real taxi and headed off to our hotel. We are staying at the Hotel Novatel Centrum. Just like in Warsaw. Everything that we have said about the Warsaw Novatel Centrum applies here except that this has no Internet. There is a business center with a very slow connection, but that is okay. The hotel does make up for its lack of Internet with the fact that it has a really nice indoor pool (Ross is thrilled), fitness area (I am thrilled), sauna (both Joyce and I are thrilled), and a hot tub (Elaine is thrilled and we think of Robin when we use it.)

Then Elaine goes “Rats, I have Ross’ bathing suit packed with the Kid’s stuff in one of the Gliwice bound bags. And she thinks she might have thrown her bathing suit in the Gliwice bag when her suitcase exploded in Warsaw.” Ross is understandably pouty since he loves to swim. We checked Elaine’s bag and found out that she does have her bathing suit. Hooray! I tell her that I’ll go get Ross a bathing suit. However, when I find the store and saw the suit selection, I remembered that I was in Europe ~ the continent of Speedos. So not being sure if Ross would wear one, I buy one for myself. Elaine was quite amused by the “Father-Son” Speedos, and said that we both look quite cute in them. They are actually more comfortable to swim in than the boxer style.

Elaine found that swimming aggravated her arm/shoulder injury but was happy to sit in the hot tub. Ross had a great time swimming but eventually we adults were all getting hungry. Not feeling that adventurous, we go to eat at the hotel’s restaurant. Joyce and I after that swimming wanted “carbos” and order the Pasta with Vegetables. We order Ross the Pierogi ruskie. Elaine went for the “Talerz Poliski” from the “Porcje Na Duze Talerze” section of the menu ~~ Literal translation is the Big Polish Plate. Elaine’s was a large amount of traditional Polish food. Joyce and I couldn’t find the “vegetables” in our pasta and were quite happy when Elaine shared her massive plate with us.

The server’s first name was Joyce’s last name. Elaine and Joyce had long suspected that some of their Polish forbearers had come from this area. I use this opportunity to work on what Elaine calls “my restaurant Polish”. As I have found on most of this trip, Polish folks are mildly pleased and very surprised that I am working on trying to learn Polish. Elaine and Joyce leave to put Ross to bed and I stayed to square up with the waiter. He asked if I was Scottish businessman that had been to Poland before. To him, this was the only plausible explanation to explain why an English speaking man would be trying to speak Polish.

I told him that we all were Americans with a Scottish last name. That Joyce and Elaine had Polish ancestry. He was incredulous that I, as an American, was making an effort to learn Polish. I have gotten this reaction from many people who work here. These extended trips to Poland (a country that is actually fond of us US types), have really opened my eyes to how the rest of the world sees us. Sadly, it is not so good. From what I’ve seen, most Americans, especially American tourists, travel the world to see different things, but then whine when everything isn’t exactly the same as it is at home. Most Americans:

=>Don’t bother to learn the basic pleasantries of the country they visit before they go. (Hello, good-bye, please, and thank you.)

=>Do say dumb stuff like “You people should . . .”

=>Do run around in tourist area being either loud or obnoxious and way too often generally both. When walking around in Krakow looking for the quickest way to the castle, I ran into some American ladies of Polish heritage. They were totally lost (I knew because they loudly stating so in English) but since they knew no Polish whatsoever, I ended up acting as a translator to get them a taxi. I also advised them to be more circumspect, i.e., when in doubt keep a low profile.

Elaine is of Polish heritage, yes, but she didn’t really know much Polish before starting the adoption process. A dozen or so names for Polish foods and one or two swear words. However, she is kicking herself that she didn’t bug her grandparents to teach her the language when she was younger. However, Elaine has a Polish face and knows that when she acts quiet, she blends in better. When she isn’t with me, most of the Polish folks greet her with “Dzien Dobry”. I don’t know what it is about me that says “Jestem Amerikanski”, Elaine says it is my height, size of my fanny pack, and the whiteness of my sneakers. So, now I am trying to speak Polish more quickly and smile less. That seems to be helping a bit.

But now she is trying to learn Polish. We both are. And our kids and the Polish folks we have met seem to appreciate it a lot ~~ “bardzo”. That is one of the reasons that we hope that the translator’s daughter can visit us in the states over the summer. We Americans are a much nicer people at home. It is difficult to understand America from a distance.

Warsaw, Poland – Tuesday, June 8, 2004

This is Lawrence. Jozef had said that he needed us in Warsaw for a couple of hours to sign some papers. We had assumed that he would have a quick cup of coffee and sign some papers and be on our way. Wrong! We would be going to the Polish Ministry of the Interior. Appointment only, guarded by soldiers, official as it gets. Oh. At the guard shack, Jozef had to show his passport to get us in.

We met with the woman who is in charge of passports. She was pleasant and efficient. Because the Ministry is appointment-only, there are no lines and we were able to meet with her in her office. Jozef had told us to dress casually. The place is very causal even the army guys are their fatigues. However, the side arms (Glock 9mm) looked pretty formal to us. I wore jeans and did not look out of place. The whole thing went well. The passport panni even gave us back some of the extra passport photos of the children. That was nice since they are really good likenesses of the children. Lawrence was asked to do 90% of the signing of documents and Elaine was only asked to sign the things where both signatures are required.

One legal document had the kids names spelled “wrong” and I was saying I was not going to sign it if their names are wrong. Jozef said, “Sign it.” Elaine said quietly, “Sign it. Remember that even names can get conjugated in Polish.” So when your beautiful wife of nearly 20 years says “Sign”, you sign. Bottom line – the passports will be ready on Monday.

Tomorrow Jozef is off to Gliwice to pick up the final paperwork that we need from the Polish court. It is an overnight trip for him. (Hey! FedEx! I see an opportunity here.) Stuff like this is always picked up in person. It reminds me of when I was a kid and my Dad would have to drive to Maine to hand deliver a quote to a client. Elaine says that there is a lot about Poland that reminds her of how things were 25 to 35 years ago.

Massachusetts to Warsaw – Sunday- Monday

The pick up from the house from the nice folks at the car service was uneventful. They brought a big van; the driver was early, and very helpful with the metric ton of baggage that we were transporting. Logan however was chockfull of slightly obnoxious “we are going to Europe to backpack” college types. The lines for the security were very long. Ross was stressing out a bit by the long waits. Who could blame him?

The flight to Paris itself was also uneventful. On a positive note, the food on Air France is very good. And they give out nice SWAG toys to the kids. However, that is last positive thing that we can say about our journey.

Lawrence and Joyce caught some Zs, however, Ross was resisting sleep. After two hours on the plane, he was saying “Are we there yet?” Elaine got no sleep whatsoever and was miserable until we got to the hotel in Warsaw.

We had a long layover (4 hours) in Paris. The miserable conditions at the airport made it seem even longer. They move people from the planes in busses and from terminal to terminal in other busses. These were all cruelly slow and comically overcrowded. Lawrence half expected to see Tokyo train guards with sticks to push us in tighter. The bus ride was miserable. We were exhausted. Elaine was exhausted from not sleeping on the plane and her shoulder was causing her much pain. She was so exhausted that when we were on the bus from the first plane, she was offered a seat from a young American college student. So, when a teenager – especially an American teenager – offers you his seat, you must look pretty darn bad.

When we finally arrived at our terminal, there were only seats behind the security checkpoints for the gates. To get seats you had to know what gate your plane was departing from. Our flight was not on the board for several hours. We could not leave the terminal area, yet we could not get to the seats because we did not know what gate to go to. We found an alcove and leaned against the wall because there were no seats. We thought that we were totally miserable, but we did not realize how good we had it. Who knew that we would be looking at the hours spent leaning on the wall in the dingy alcove as our happiest time in Paris.

After about 90 minutes in our hovel, we saw our flight on the board. Hooray! Gate 28! So, even though we had never left a secure area, we had to go through security to get to Gate 28. We got in that long line and shuffled along with our fellow refugees. At the security checkpoint – after we already have our shoes off – we are told that it is now Gate 25.

Off we shuffle to Gate 25, through the security checkpoint, and finally to seats. Fairly comfortable seats even if they were from a Roger Moore/Sean Connery era James Bond movie, but these were seats. And so we sat. This was not as trivial as it seems as we were beyond tired. We sat. We even stretched out a bit. We started to think that things are looking up. However, after about 20 minutes of rest we noticed the sign on Gate 25 said “Moscow”. You’ll never guess which gate our flight moved to. Anybody guess “28”? Yep. Gate 28. Lawrence tried in vain to get someone from Security to escort us back through to 28. By this time, we had been through no fewer than four security checks and had never been allowed out of secure areas. No dice. Good-bye Gate 25.

Of course, the line at Gate 28 was huge and slow. By the time we made it through the security checkpoint, they were already boarding the bus for the flight to schlep us to the tarmac. They rushed us onto the crowded un-air conditioned bus and then had us all wait, wait, and wait for stranglers (We should have told them to check gate 25). A nice older Polish businessman offers Elaine his seat. He probably was concerned that she was going to fall on him. The only good thing about the crowded bus is that there was no room to actually fall.

The ride on the tarmac to the plane was so long that Lawrence jokingly said, “Maybe we are driving to Warsaw.” Fortunately, there was a plane and the plane ride was uneventful. We both believe that “uneventful” is an adjective we want to describe our travel by.

We get to the Warsaw airport. Mimi had said that Jozef would meet us. When he didn’t show up for about 45 minutes, we took a taxi. When the supervisor of the taxi line saw the three carts worth of luggage that we were pushing, he called out the big van. We needed it.

When we were within about a mile of the Novatel Centrum, there was much rejoicing. The Novatel Centrum is only rated as three stars, but we like it. Very dependable, clean, and what we most prized at this moment – predictable. Check-in was smooth, the porter went and got his biggest luggage cart, and off to the 28th floor we ascended. Elaine napped, Ross and Joyce rested, and Lawrence – as he always does – went out for a walk to get water, tea, and bread. Though miserable and very tired, we were – at last one step closer to the children.

After our rest, Joyce and Elaine said that they were going to the hotel restaurant. The guys just caught a quick bite and went for a longer walk. Unbeknownst to the boys, the gals had decided to go for a stroll themselves, and we all met on the main thoroughfare about 15 minutes out from the hotel.

The guys walked to the movie theatre to see what time “Harry Potter” was playing, but they had already missed the last showing. After Lawrence had walked Ross’ nogas off, they had a taxi take them on a tour of Stare Miasto (old town). This is an area that suffered a lot of destruction in WWII but was completely rebuilt so it looks like the original 16th century buildings.

We are sorry that Joyce and Ross first international journey was so miserable. We are praying that since we are flying a different carrier through a different airport that the way back is less onerous. Please pray for that for us. We would like the children’s first long airline trip to be better than what Joyce and Ross experienced with us.

Date and Location- Massachusetts - Weekends May 22-23, May 29-31, and June 4-6

Lawrence and I had a lot of trouble picking just one name for this post. There were so many good ones. “Many hands make light work” “It takes a village”, “We get by with a LOT of help from our friends”, or “Midwifes to Joy”

Basically, we could not have had the house ready for the kids without our own dream extreme make over weekend warriors helping us during these last couple of weeks. One couple even got babysitting for their own kids to help us get ready for our Polish trio of children.

Their help was heaven sent and they are our own angels on earth. We literally don’t know what we would have done with out these folks’ help:

Matt and Sharon
Elizabeth
Robin, Ron, and Justin
Karen and Gary
Mike
Susan
Joyce
Marci
Julie B. (repeatedly)
Christine H.
Lisa “Pierogi” G
Missy
Esther
Jeff

Among other things, these folks swept, vacuumed, cleaned, cooked for the troops, moved stuff from one room to the next, went shopping for key items, moved beds, built beds, made beds, sorted donated clothing, schlepped donated clothing to St Vinny De Paul, stuffed excess but still nice clothing into duffle bags for the “Good Sisters”, organized toys, hung shelves, moved around phone/cable wires, schlepped Ross to soccer, and allowed us to keep a little sanity in our lives.

On one evening there were nine people working inside the house at one time. On another night there were seven. Lawrence says that it was like the old Marx Brothers movie where they are on a cruise ship and more and more people keep coming into the stateroom. It was funny. People made great efforts to get things as perfect as possible. They worked very hard. Yet, we were often struck by how people would thank us for letting them help. Our new children have no idea of the small army that is eager for their arrival.

We also received generous gift certificates from:

Wayne
Marci
Elizabeth
Julie B.
Linda A.
Colette
Gail H.

These certificates helped purchase the shelves that were hung, lamps, hangers for all that donated clothing, and new bed linens for the children.

Sunday evening we head back to Poland to pick up the kids. This time, our son Ross and Joyce are going with us. We are very excited to be going back to get the children and having the whole family together under one roof.

This is Elaine here. Events of the very recent past have reminded me of two stories related to “R” birth nearly 10 years ago in Alabama. Lawrence and I knew and worked with two separate ladies both named Kim and both with the same last name. For reference purposes, we called them, “His Kim G” and “My Kim G”.

As some of you know. I had a rough labor and delivery with “R”. He was born as a C-section after 26 hours of unsuccessful labor. “His Kim G” thought it would be a neat idea to collect every one that Lawrence and I worked with and hightail it down to the hospital for a visit.

Our good friend and co-worker Adam E was very wise to nip this plan in the bud. He knew from Lawrence’s phone call to work that I was exhausted and in NO condition to play hostess. “His Kim G” knickers were in a knot for quite some time afterwards because she wanted to “do something” for the birth.

After a week home with “R”, “My Kim G” called and asked if I had plans for supper the next day. I told her that I was still in pretty rough shape and in no condition to go out to dinner. “My Kim G” said “That isn’t why I’m calling. If you’d like, I’ll come over tomorrow with a complete supper and be in and out of your house in 6 minutes.” Not surprisingly, I said YES!

“My Kim G” arrived at the time she said she would. She brought a crisp green salad with Newman’s Own Salad Dressing, a potato cheese sausage casserole, and a home made cherry nut cobbler. She put the hot stuff in the oven and the cold stuff in the refrigerator. She asked a few questions about my health, complimented the baby, and then went on her way within the 6 stated minutes.

It was one of the most delicious dinners I have ever had.

To commemorate that act of kindness, I would like to announce the winners of the “My Kim G” adoption awards for the months April and May. This award is given to a person who gave us the help we needed when we needed and how we needed it.

For April, it was clear that mdyesowitch was the winner. Many of you have told me how much you enjoyed seeing pictures of the children on the Web site ~~ That was her! Using the live journal ~~ That was her idea! She also arranged for both our Mothers to receive timely Mother’s day gifts. Another behind the scenes activities, she also created Polish countdown calendars for our Polish trio to check off the days until we meet again.

May was a more competitive month. There were so many nominees. There was Laura DA who donated very lovely fall and winter clothes in girl 4T, Christine H who donated handsome boys clothing, Robin H who is loaning us huge suitcase to hold donations for the orphanage, and Takis who donated some beautiful girl dresses (some with tags still attached). And that is just to name a few of the folks who have donated stuff.

However, by unanimous vote, Julie B has the award for May because she tirelessly helped me sort through all these donation of clothes last weekend (and Sunday was her birthday).

Let's all give them a round of applause!

This is Elaine.

Lawrence and I thought that we owed you, our loyal viewers, the update on our plans.

First, there is no shower planned. Originally, we thought it might happen between the trips. However, circumstances have made it impossible to do so. Some folks thought it would be nice to have a shower in our back yard after the kids came home. However, Lawrence and I both feel that a shower where “I”, “D”, and “M” are "getting stuff" and “R” was left out ~~ would give the wrong message to the Polish trio and hurt “R's” feelings. “R” is a big hearted kid but he is still a kid. Also, given the sheltered life that the Polish trio has had, being "shown off" would be disconcerting to them, especially the youngest.

Right now, we are frantically trying to rearrange our household to accommodate three more bodies. We have had some really wonderful donations of used clothes and toys. Now, the stuff we still need for them is largely stuff that we have to go and get ourselves ~~ things like dressers/bureaus, shoes, linens, and underwear.

What we still need to do is the unglamorous activities like sorting of clothes, organizing of toys, repair of the play structure, yard work, moving of furniture, and the re-arranging of rooms. Any volunteers? So, you can understand why you don’t hear from us much these days.

As for the things we still need for the children, we feel a bit weird asking for gift certificates especially since the kind we like are singularly boring (Wal-Mart, Target, Payless Shoes, Linens-N-Things, and Lands End). You've all been so generous and open-hearted, that we feel very blessed, but if you feel like you must give something, see the list above. Some of you have asked.

We are leaving the second week of June. There is something that we have to sign for the Polish Lawyer that will let us pick them up three days later. However, there is a holiday in the middle of that period, so we have to wait for four days. We will pick them up on the 12th probably in the late afternoon (we have to wait for the Polish Lawyer to make the long drive from Warsaw). The next day we all make the long drive back to Warsaw for several days of American Embassy processing starting on Monday.

After that we will have a long, long flight home. Lawrence and I found the flight very hard and we are seasoned travelers in comparison to the rest of our traveling troupe. Neither “R” nor my mum has flown internationally. As for the Polish trio, they have hardly been in a car let alone in a plane. I ask for prayers that everyone is able to catch some sleep on the long flight over the Atlantic. This trip home will take 16+ hours including all the flights, waits, and immigration processing.

We will let you all know when we have recovered. Someone said that they might be willing to be "casserole coordinator" to help supply dinners for the first couple of weeks home. That is a nice offer. I have to find out if she is still available to do this.

This is Lawrence.

Several of you have said that you have questions for us. Elaine and I will be making a FAQ page (frequently asked questions) page before our next trip. Please feel free to post your questions to this log or send it to one of our non-work emails. We will answer all appropriate questions.

In transit – May 12, 2004

This is Lawrence.

On the 11th Jozef brought us back to the Hotel Silvia after we left court. We said goodbye to Danuta and headed upstairs to the suite one last time. We had mostly packed and just needed to get out of our court clothes and into our traveling clothes. Jozef would be back for us after lunch.

Before we got out of our court clothes, we asked one of the clerks to take a photo of us to commemorate the day. (Not as if we are going to forget it anytime soon, but the photo was nice.) I was a little sad to change from my nice suit into my grass-stained, soup-stained, dirty cargo pants. The cargo pants were great to have with me. Comfortable and with lots of pockets, they are definitely great for traveling. Still, one day – when the high chair had been lost – I had “M” on my lap while he ate soup. For a three year-old he is a really neat eater. Repeat – for a three year-old. So, we joked about how our clothes were not really dirty, they were just “experienced”.

We ordered up a big lunch because we had not eaten much breakfast and had not had second breakfast. We were also unclear as to when we would get to eat again. To celebrate how well court had gone, I even ordered a bowl of the fantastic ice cream that they serve at the Hotel Silvia. (Chocolate this time for those keeping score.)

Around 2:30 (14:30); the bill paid, the car loaded, and our goodbyes said; we headed on the road to Warsaw. I may have mentioned in an earlier post that Poland has borrowed an awful lot of money to build new highways and you see a lot of highway construction. Good. Not a moment too soon. The size, quality, and availability of Polish roads varies greatly. What should be a three-hour car ride to Warsaw is a six hour ride. When we have to make that ride with the kids, we figure it will take eight.

Along the road to Warsaw, we were caught in a violent hailstorm and had to wait up for a while. It didn’t help that the road has ruts. However, by 8:15 (20:15) Jozef had delivered us safely back to the Hotel Novatel Centrum. We wanted to return to the hotel that we had stayed at earlier because we were not eager for surprises. Too tired for that.

After we checked in, Elaine logged on to update the journal and I headed out to the bookstore to buy more Polish-English books and a couple of Polish books meant for first and second graders. I am determined to continue to make progress towards learning Polish.

Then I went down into the tunnels to find us a little food. The pedestrian tunnels – with the little shops that line them – are not as scary as I was led to believe and I was able to get a slice of passable Hawaiian pizza.

Even though we had an early flight, I stayed up late reading the replies to our posts that many of you have made to this journal. I cannot tell you how much we appreciated getting those replies from everybody. A special thanks to Robin H. and Auntie Gail for letting us know that we weren’t talking to ourselves.

I asked for a 5:00 AM wake-up call and headed for bed. Breakfast is not served until 6:00 and we had to be at the airport for 6:45 since they tell you to be there two hours ahead of time. In the U.S.A. they want you there three hours ahead and they mean it. So, we left the hotel before breakfast. Well, it seems that we should have had breakfast.

We arrived at the airport right on time and got to our check-in point where we were told to come back later. (Quite snottily by the lone rude person that we met in Poland.) So, we waited the 15 minutes to check-in and then headed off to a mediocre and very expensive breakfast. Finally, we were able to head to the gate and board the little plane.

Because the plane for the flight to Munich was small, they were going around the waiting area tagging the larger carry-on items to check. I was lucky that they did not take my case away from me this time as they had the last time. The case had sustained scratches but had protected the laptop and cameras wonderfully. (Anyone wants to here me extol the virtues of this case I brought at reasonable price on the Internet, just ask me.)

The flight from Warsaw to Munich was lovely. The food and service was wonderful. One stewardess (who looked like Marcia Brady) even switched into PERFECT American English when Elaine did not understand her German. She told us that she had been an exchange student in America. Well, only two hours to Munich.

The Munich airport is odd. It is modernistic to the point of being user-unfriendly. It is hard to find anything because there are very few signs and the ones that do exist are too stylish to be easy to use.

Finally, we got to security and both got cross-examined and patted down. They were confused as to why I carry a compass. “So I always know which way I am going” didn’t immediately seem to satisfy them. I never really considered my compass a weapon of mass destruction. Just between you and me, I think that they really admired the compass that I carry and were looking for a pretext to confiscate it. They didn’t. But, I could tell that they wanted to. So, after the full-body German massages, we headed to the gate.

The gate is right near where you come off the elevator for the terminal, which is only about a half mile away from the security station. So, you can see the gate behind a thick glass wall, but you don’t actually get to it for another 28 minutes.

I had not liked Lufthansa on the first flight. My seat had not reclined, the stewardess was snippy, the food odd, and the movies poor. This one went a little better. It showed nearly the same movies that it did on the way over. However, one of the stations showed Discovery Channel documentaries including one about Boston’s Big Dig which helped to pass away some of the nearly eight hour flight.

It was a mostly smooth flight and I dozed some. Elaine was tired enough that even she dozed a little bit. Coming down from Canada we had some rough going, but they dipped below it. I generally dislike flying and was very happy when we landed at Logan Airport in Boston.

We breezed through Customs because we got to go in the American citizens only line, got our bags, and headed to hook-up with the car service. We will not be so quick through Customs the next time when we have three children with Polish passports, but it should not be that hard either.

I must say that I have always thought that The Big Dig was a waste of money, but the ride from the airport through the tunnels was quick. I had thought that they could just build a new airport with rail, highway, and bus links somewhere else much cheaper than The Big Dig. Probably true, but not what they did.

In the car, we called our mothers and my brother Tom. We were giddy to be on our home turf again. We got home in time to be sitting on our front stairs when Ross got off the school bus. He ran to see us, dropped his book bag, and flung himself into Elaine’s arms. It looks like he grew since we left. It sure looks like he is a very big boy – especially compared to his brothers and sister.

We talked and wrestled with Ross, emptied the suitcases, talked with our mothers, and tried to stay up to adjust to the time. We were very wound-up from all that had happened lately. Elaine fell asleep about 7:30 (19:30) (Note from Elaine: I didn’t fall asleep as much collapse fully clothed spread eagle on the bed). After Ross went to bed, I tried to answer E-mail. I actually fell asleep while typing at the computer. Time for bed. I had made it to 9:30 (21:30). My body thought that it was 3:30 and had mostly been awake for the last 23.5 hours. Yeah. I’m bit tired. You?

Hi All, this is Elaine. Lawrence and I, to make our flight to our home in New England, we had to get up a couple of hours earlier than usual. The flight with all the required waiting will take over 12 hours plus our internal time clocks will be off.

For the next couple of days our phone at home will only work one way. Out. Our Mums will get calls to let them know that we are safely home again but after that we have to concentrate on the bravest, sweetest, nicest boy in North America. He was willing to give up his parents for 3 whole weeks to make this endeavor a reality. And if he was not such a wonderful person, we would not have wanted to be parents three more times.

The best way to communicate with us during the next couple of days is to post to this journal or to send us email to our non-work email address.

Love,
The weary travellers

Gliwice, Poland – May 11, 2004

This is Lawrence. This is the post that you have all been waiting for. We went to court this morning and the children are now named MacDonald. M-A-C-D-O-N-A-L-D. This is their last name. Rest assured, that they do have first names and middle names also. Two of the children’s first names did not change at all and one child’s first name uses the same letters just rearranged. So, there are now six of us. Momma, Ross, the three kids we adopted today, and Tata.

I wanted to skip to the end of the story because I know that you all might be miffed with me if I told it in chronological order. Here is the fuller story of our day in court.

Last night Jozef, Elaine, and I took a cab to dinner. We wanted to have some wine and relax, so Jozef wisely suggested taking a cab to the restaurant. This is the restaurant that Jozef had been raving about and had promised to take us to for a more that a week.

We get there and find that there are no cars in the parking lot and the lights aren’t on. Jozef could not understand why we would not get out of the cab, but since we figured that it was not “everybody walk to dinner and eat in the dark night” in Poland, that the lack of any cars or lights was a bad sign. There was a sign that said that place was closed on Mondays. We had a good laugh about this at a time when we all needed one.

The restaurant that Jozef then took us to was fabulous. The meal was great and the service outstanding. In a later post, I will list the name and address. We enjoyed a nice Portuguese wine with a delicious dinner that included perfect and plentiful veggies. At dinner, Jozef told us how he got into this business. If you adopt with his assistance, he will tell you this story too. You should consider doing so as the story is well worth it. In all seriousness, how Jozef got in this business is not my story to tell. It is a great, heart-warming story, but is not the story we are telling here.

At dinner, Jozef briefed us as to what would happen in court. It was good to get an insight as to how the procedure was going to be. We talked about what questions are generally asked. Mostly, we just relaxed.

In the morning, I went downstairs to get Elaine coffee and food. I wasn’t hungry, but I ate a little anyway. In shocking news, I had some tea. I put on my suit that I had ironed two weeks ago and Elaine looked lovely in her dress. We met Jozef at 8:00 AM.

We have probably passed the court building 20 times since we got here as it is along the logical route to the children’s home. Still, going inside was a lot different from driving by it. It was very like courts in Lowell where I have had to serve jury duty and it was very different in some ways.

We arrived early, passed through security, and headed upstairs. We climbed a lot of stairs. Elaine – who is usually quick on her feet – kept lagging because of the dress shoes that she was wearing. We passed many nice benches, but none near where we needed to be. So, we stood and paced.

We were very happy to see Danuta the translator also arrived early. While waiting, Jozef asked her to read the social worker’s report to us. Let me just say this. We did good. It was very positive. As adults, we get very few report cards – at least in writing. So, it was heartening to know that this report was good before going into court.

Around 9:00 A.M. we were starting to wonder when we would begin and where Sister Director was. Sister is the children’s legal guardian. We could not proceed without her. Jozef quickly figured out that Sister Director was in the building talking to people about other cases. As we have said in other posts, she works hard to get these children freed-up for adoption.

Finally, we got called into the courtroom. It is not what I expect. It is far simpler than I had imagined it would be. There is a judge and two jurors sitting at a table. They are all wearing robes. The judge is sitting in the middle. She is also wearing a large chain with an very large Polish Eagle. This Polish Eagle is the sign that she is the judge. The D.A. is at another table and wearing a robe. Elaine, Jozef, Danuta, Sister Director, and I are asked to sit on a very uncomfortable bench at the back of the court. The only other person there was the court clerk taking notes on a very loud typewriter.

The proceedings start by verifying our personal data, documents being read into the record, and recording the children’s new legal names. The documents being read into the record are all ones that we have all seen, but it has to be done. These documents include the very good report that we got from the social worker.

Then the fun begins. They call me to testify. I stand at the bar as in English court. Danuta stands next to me to translate. I am very happy that she has such wonderful English skills. I understand some of the questions and even suspect that I could work out answers in Polish. However, I figured that if I started with my pigeon Polish that Jozef would NOT be happy. I answer in English and look directly at the judge. Your impulse is to look at the translator, but you must look at the judge. This is not as easy as you would think.

I felt strange in a business suit in a room of only adults talking about the kids and whether or not we would be good parents to them. It is the sort of thing that is easier to show. Yes, we had done that with the social worker and the nuns.

After I testified, Elaine testified. She was perfect. It is hard for me to tell, but I could swear that they questioned her longer than they questioned me. They also asked her harder questions. Elaine also got the follow-up questions from the DA. The most entertaining moment came when the DA asked how we communicate with the children. When she showed how we play the dinosaur game, it was funny enough that everyone either smiled or let out a small chuckle.

Sister Director was the only other witness. Did she support our partition? Yes, she did. That was the most important question of the day. She recapped the children’s history, but that part of the story is in the past and I think that we’ll skip that.

When talking about our bonding with the children, she talked about how even though “M” doesn’t say much, he was the first one waiting for us each day. She was very kind in her comments about us.

The children love the nuns and the women who work with the children. They are loved by them and feel safe with them. We know that the sisters are going to really miss the children and that makes it all the more impressive that the Sisters work to free them up for adoption. I guess that is the definition of love – doing what is best for the one you love. These Sisters are just awesome!

After Sister Director testified, the clerk asked us to step outside to wait for the verdict. We knew that it had gone well, but were still nervous. The great philosopher Yogi Berra said; “it ain’t over until it’s over.” Thankfully, we did not have to wait long. About 20 minutes later, we were called back in.

We stood for the verdict. The judge read it and then asked the translator to read it to us. She read it so matter-of-factly that I had to ask one more time. “Is it ‘yes’?” “Of course, it is yes.” The children are part of our family. Repeat. The children are now part of our family.

We thanked the judge and she said that she was pleased. Court was dismissed and we filed out into the hall. There were hugs all around. Sister Director was very happy. She asked us if we could try to keep “I’s” Polish up since he can already read and write. Of course, she would like us to try with all three. We promised to try. When the judge, jurors, and DA came out they all had big smiles on their faces.

One of the jurors came by, shook our hands, and told us that; “this is a wonderful thing!” Well said.

Gliwice, Poland – May 10, 2004

This is Lawrence.

This Monday is wedged in between our last day with the kids (yesterday) and our day in court (tomorrow). Jozef had to go to court in Rybnyk on another case and then go collect the social worker’s report on our case. He wanted Elaine and I to rest, pack, and prepare for court.

In the morning, I walked the two miles to the village where there is – among other things – a nice bakery. It was cool this morning. So, walking the four miles was perfect. Elaine got some much-needed rest. When I returned, I was carrying chocolate croissant and coffee. She was not upset.

Note to New Englanders: Still have not found the Dunkin Donuts.

We went to breakfast later than usual and discovered that the Swedish Table had been all put away. No problem. We could order from the breakfast sets. I thought that I was asking for my fried egg cooked more than the Poles think is normal and instead I wound up with scrambled eggs. They were – as always – very kind and brought me what I wanted. I did hear the waitress talking loudly trying to get the cook to make my eggs like I will eat them. They really still don’t believe that I want them cooked as much as I do.

Jozef agreed to drop us off at the nice two-seat Internet café so that we could post and see who had written back. Trust me. We read and appreciate each reply. Well, today it is the nice ONE-seat Internet café. Luckily, THE machine was available when we got there. We have discovered a couple of other Internet places, but we are very comfortable with this one.

We enjoyed the time updating the log, checking E-mail, and using Google to help solve the curveball of the day. While making small talk with Jozef on the way into town, we listed what we intend to name the children. He told us that we WOULD NOT be allowed to use the name we have selected for the girl because we wanted to use the diminutive version that ends in “ka”. Adding the “k” before the last “a” sort of adds; “my dear little” to the front of her name. We were told that there is an official list of acceptable names in Poland. Yep. You may want to re-read that last bit. If a name is not on that list, you cannot name your child it. He even used his mobile phone to call the government agency that polices this. I swear that I am not making this up.

Adding the “k” to the end of “D’s” name protects it from one of the worst flaws of a New England accent. Words that end in “ta” tend to sound like the end in “ter” or “taaaahhhh” when said by New Englanders. Not pretty. So, you will all use the version that ends in “ka”. Are we clear on this? No questions? Good.

So, we used Google to research Polish girl names. There are many pretty ones, but they are not her name. The little girl has a strong sense of identity and is attached to her name. Frankly, it sounds better than the English version too. Because of “the list”, we thought that the middle names that we have chosen for the boys were going to be disallowed because they may not be on this list and were unsure that the Anglicizing of the oldest boy’s name would also not be allowed. After we returned to the hotel, we called our American facilitator to find out about this heretofore unheard of list. She has lots of experience and we found it odd that she never mentioned this to us before.

After lunch, our American facilitator called back and explained that we could have English versions of the boy’s middle names and the Anglicization of “I’s” name, but we can NOT use a Polish nickname. We have not given up on this. So, stay tuned. Of course, you realize that by the time you read this it will have already happened.

I want to stop here and clarify something I said in my post; “Open Letter to Grinch” I pointed out that the only advice regarding the children’s names that I have listened to is from the family – especially my brother Tom. Why? Simple. They are family and it was just advice. They know that it was not a poll, but truly have the best interests of the children in mind. Of course, Elaine and I made the final decisions. Well, the ones we are allowed to make.

After the hubbub about adding the “k”; we ate, packed, cleaned, caught up on posts, and had a generally quiet day. Not as quiet as we would have had if we did not decide to insert the special “k” into little “D’s” name. But much quieter than any day has been for a while and any is likely to be for a very long time.

It is too bad that we cannot just have the court date and just all jump on a plane ride to go and home to Ross. It will seem like such a long ride home to him. We cannot wait to see him.

I am going to sign off now and get some of that rest that I am supposed to be getting. Tonight we have our huddle before court. We are going to a nice restaurant that Jozef knows.

Gliwice, Poland - May 9, 2004

This is Lawrence again with another long post from another big day. Sorry if these posts are too long. You have to realize that a lot is happening here.

On Saturday night when I had gone downstairs to get Elaine’s ice cream; I noticed that the door to the nightclub was open. I had been assured that “The Scream Club” was out of business. Since our suite is on that side of the hotel, I was worried. I was reassured that the nightclub was not being used. However, that is where breakfast would be served on Sunday since there were no fewer that five First Communion brunches scheduled for the restaurant.

So, I took a peek at “The Scream Club” and instantly realized that this was not where I wanted the children to take their morning meal. Very dark décor (with a nasty Halloween theme), only red couches and coffee tables to sit at, and a leaky roof. Hmmm, I guess we will have breakfast in our room.

In the morning, Elaine’s brother John called to wish her a happy “Mother’s Day”. It was very kind of him to call and it made her smile. At one point he heard me in the background telling the children to be careful of the electric hot pot. So, he can confirm that it sounds funny to hear me speaking in Polish.

I went down and loaded up a large tray with food and hauled it up to the suite. I guess that I will be buying eggs at Costco for a while. “D” gets her hard boiled egg and “M” gets his scrambled eggs. Of course, “I” has the tomato, cucumber, and cheese sandwich similar to my sandwich.

After breakfast, we went out to play and ran around like nuts. We played the usual games - the dinosaur game, kicking the soccer ball, swinging, and climbing the play structure.

We had worried that the children would not like being cooped up in the room or - worse yet - see other children playing in “their” yard. At these First Communion brunches, the children get bored long before the adults. Once bored, they want to run around outside. Makes sense to me. However, we had to figure out what to do with the kids.

We asked Jozef to take us out and perhaps take us to Tesco to get some clothing for the children. Jozef agreed to take us on a shopping trip to Tessco to buy clothes for the children. Like many men and too few women, Jozef hates shopping, but we needed him to help figure out the sizes. I must say that Elaine is a very focused shopper. She goes and gets what she is after. She does not stroll about. She gets in, gets out, and nobody gets hurt. Jozef was impressed at how quickly she accomplished our goal.

We bought two virtually identical outfits for each child. One for them to wear now and one for us to take home as templates for measuring their new clothes. Tessco clothes are not of the greatest quality, but that was what was open on Sunday. Once back in the car, little “D” and “M” started to take off their clothes. They wanted to wear their new clothes. I was able to stop this and “I” looked at me and rolled his eyes in a way that made clear that he was above all of that as he is much more mature.

On the way to lunch, we had the scare of our lives. I had decided to let “D” sit next to the window and sit “I” in the middle. While we were going about 45 MPH on a curvy road, she opened the door. I had “M” on my lap on the other side of the car. I locked my right arm around “M” and shot my left arm around the other two children. They were buckled in, but I grabbed them anyway. Jozef acted very quickly. While bringing the car to a safe stop, he reached back with his left arm and got the door closed. We were damned lucky that no cars were coming at us.

I have learned to say, “X is not a toy”. For example, “the lamp is not a toy”. As with most small children, I say this a lot - especially with “M”. When I do not know what something is called, I just point and say, “not a toy”. I am sure that she now knows that the car door is not a toy. She was terrified.

Nobody yelled at her, but we sure talked to her. She did not say a single thing until we got to lunch almost 20 minutes later. She now sits in the middle seat and Elaine deployed the child locks. At home, she and “M” are slated to sit in the back row of the van. I have already enlisted Ross as a “good shepherd” to help us buckle the children in, hold their hands, and so forth. I think that “I” is good at this too. He often gets either “D” or “M” by one hand while Elaine or I have the other. Also, the back row of the van has no doors.

We headed off to have pizza at an Italian restaurant near the court building. The service was very slow partly because there were several First Communion lunches. We had pizza and garlic bread. One order of garlic bread disproved three assumptions that all of the adults held. We believed that garlic bread:

1. Came before the meal.
2. Came hot.
3. Had garlic butter on it.

Nope. We got a loaf of bread and some garlic butter. However, this was not too useful since it came after the pizza.

Only “I” liked the pizza. The other children did not. They ate a little bread with out the garlic butter and drank juice. However, by this time it was clear that “M” was still exhausted from the day before. (Note from Elaine: I never thought I would look fondly back at my high school's cafe's pizza.)

We headed back to the hotel - with “D” sitting in the middle. The children were not happy to see children from the Communion dinners playing in the yard. I tried to cheer “M” up by holding him like an airplane. At first, he giggled as usual, but then cried. The poor kid needed a nap, but all attempts to cuddle him for one failed.

We watched a short video that Elaine had bought for them and then got to wear our new clothes. You are all going to be mad at me. I took no pictures of this. We were enjoying the moment and did not get chance to take photos. They all loved the new clothes and the colors are much more to my liking than what they wear now. I am especially not going to miss seeing the little boy in pink pants. His new pants are navy blue. Thank you.

We played for a while and made an enormous amount of noise pretending to be Native Americans drumming and singing. Since much of the hotel is ceramic tile and open format, sound really travels around this building. I fear that the Communion dinners downstairs had a soundtrack they did not expect.

At 5:00 (17:00) it was time for the talk. Jozef came to the suite and sat on the floor and explained to the children that Mummy and Tata must go back to America to tell brat (brother) Ross that they are will be there soon and that we have to buy their beds and get their rooms ready. This is all very true. If we had set up their beds before we came over, they would have all been incorrect for them. So, if you know anybody who wants to buy a frame for a twin over full bunk set or a headboard and footboard for a twin bed, please have them contact me. “M” and “D” will sleep in the toddler beds with sides and we will also need sides for “I”.

At the end of the talk, we gave the children each a small stuffy that we had bought for them. So, they packed up the stuffies that Ross gave them, the new ones, the ball caps, and the toys from McDonalds.

We got in the car to go and they all said goodbye to the “little house”. By the time we took them back to the home, “M” was staggering. It was only 5:30. They were all exhausted.

We had a big round of goodbyes and the children seemed very happy. I did not say goodbye. I said goodnight. We figure that in a few days they will realize that it will be longer than expected until we see each other again. However, Elaine gave each a little photo album of our family and house in America. She also gave them calendars that Marci H. had made for them. These have photos of Ross and us on each page. These only go to July. We better be back before they expire. The sisters will talk to them each day about these.

(Note from Elaine: Many parents who have been here before us, have said that the big good bye is anti-climatic. They were right. “I’, “D”, and “M” gave us as breezy a “doe bra notes” as Ross had given us a “goodbye” in America two and half weeks ago. Children even ones as old as Ross, don’t have a firm concepts about how time works.)

Of course, we were sad upon parting with them, but realize that this is what we need to do in order to finish the work of getting them home. Frankly, most of the time I forget that they are speaking Polish. We just get on so well.

At the hotel, we had a quick dinner and Elaine wisely started organizing the room. The toys that are kept in the closet were separated from the ones that we are saving for the children. Some of the stuff we bought will go in the collection used by all families in this suite. But, special stuff like the Barbie doll will be kept for our kids. The hotel is nicely letting us store a suitcase in the closet. This is filled with stuff that we don’t need again until our return for the children. That is a great help.

Krakow, Poland - May 8, 2004

Lawrence here. This is a very long post. In many ways, May 8th was the longest day of the trip.

When the morning came we still did not know if we were going to Krakow. Jozef was in no shape to go with us and we did not want to rely on my Polish to get us through. While trying to tell “M” that I was happy, I actually said that I was a pair of sandals. The words sound alike and I did get it right on the second try. One reason that I get as much right as I do is that I do not care if I mess up. I mess up, try again, and on I sail. However, you can understand that I am not willing to go hundreds of kilometers without back-up.

At breakfast, I went downstairs ten minutes before Elaine and the children and got things rolling. I know what each person wants and got that for them. Little “D” likes to start with a hard boiled egg, we were told that she did not like to eat breakfast, but soon learned that she likes hard boiled eggs. “M” started with scrambled eggs and kilbaska (what we would call a hot dog), and “I” likes a cucumber, tomato, and cheese sandwich like I eat. Partly, he likes it because I do.

After breakfast, I tried to call Jozef six or seven times and there was no answer. Finally, about 9:00 I went to find him. Turns out that the phone in his room was not working. We had been worried that his back had gotten worse and he needed help. False alarm. He and I discuss details of today and the next few days. Turns out that the translator has agreed to go in Jozef’s place and that Jarrik the driver is only 15 minutes away from the hotel. Good thing that Elaine and I had already packed as if we were going.

Getting the car seats set was a challenge. This is made more of a challenge in that “M” is a powerful little guy. I cannot overstate this. This kid is strong. He has also never been in a car seat. The car seat being used for “M” is brand new and some assembly is required. Jarrik gets things fixed and off we roll. We made it halfway up the driveway before our first stop. If there are two words that I have learned to say in Polish they are “please stop”. We adjust ourselves and make it out of the driveway.

We head to Rybnyk to pick up the translator who has graciously agreed to spend a beautiful Saturday helping us take the children to Krakow. After a wrong turn or two, we get to her apartment and she comes out to meet us. We make it most of the way down the driveway before we have to stop. Little “D” has to go shiko. Danuta offers to let us take her in to her apartment. To accomplish this, she has to kick one of her teenage sons out of the bathroom as he was just about to bathe. The shiko run accomplished, we make it out of the driveway.

One of the good things that came out of “D”s shiko run is that we found out that Danuta was the mother of three. We asked her about Jozef’s suggestions for what to do with children in Krakow, and she said some of them would not interest the younger children especially “M”. So we punted, and got to explain what “punted” means.

When you meet Danuta you are struck by how excellent her English is. Not good. Excellent. It takes you a moment or two to realize that she is not British, but, in fact, Polish. I strongly doubt that she ever told anybody that she was a pair of sandals. Or even a pair of happy sandals.

Elaine sat Danuta next to her and they chat as we roll along. We pick her brain about things we would like to say to the children and verify some of the things we have been saying. I am pleased by how many we have been getting right. Danuta finds it interesting how many idioms and how much slang Elaine and I use when talking to each other. Simple answer, we have known each other more than half of our lives. We have our own shorthand. She seems to enjoy asking us to explain things like “I must of lost my marbles”.

I must have lost my marbles because today was the Feast of Saint Stanislaus and the day of the Krakow Marathon. Both events were taking place in the very spot we were heading. Just the car ride to pick up Danuta was the longest ride of the children’s lives. The ride to Krakow and the crowds that we would be in would be amazing to them. Around 12:30 we get to Krakow. It is time for lunch. We are not the only people to have come to this conclusion. Even though we eat there very seldom, we decide that today is the day to introduce the children to McDonalds hamburgers. Clearly, my marbles are still misplaced at this point.

We wedge ourselves into a McDonalds near the Cloth Hall. We get a few seats at one table and a few at another. Being Poland, people seeing that we have three small children were more than willing to move to other tables for us so we could sit as a group. One of many nice things about Poland is that if a place like McDonalds is full that people will let you have the empty seats at their tables. I went off to order.

Danuta asked if she could help. I asked her to stay and help keep the children calm. However, once she saw that “M” had calmed down she caught up with me as I ordered. (Elaine may have been afraid that I would order sandals.) Elaine isn’t sure enough of her Polish verbal comprehension, but she could swear that she heard Jarrik was telling Danuta later that she (Elaine) was did a good job keeping the children entertained at MacDonald. Well at least she hopes that is what he said.

I got some cute photos and the children liked the fries and toys, but did not like the burgers. Smart kids. “I” ate half a burger because he saw me eat one, but “M” - who is the best eater of the three - would not even touch it. The good news is that McDonalds happy meals come with juice here. The bad news is that the hamburgers taste exactly the same.

Jarrik accompanied us after we left the van. Many drivers would have just hung around and read the newspaper, but he helped us through the crowds and watched over Elaine and the children when I went to order. It looked like we had a bodyguard. He is big and muscular. Often during the course of the day I would peek just behind us and he was there - especially while we were shopping in the Cloth Hall. The Cloth Hall, is tourist souvenir central, however, M is freaking out and keeps climbing up me so I couldn’t even see in front of me. Not in a great thing in area where the tourist books say to watch out for pick pockets. Every time I turned around, I noticed the ever-vigilante Jarrik covering my back. I would not choose him as a guy to pick on.

With Danuta’s help, I told him the joke we wrote in an early post. She laughs at the punch line and then tells him in Polish. Then he laughs. And then he tells an equally good joke in Polish and then she translates for us. Humor may not be universal, but need to laugh certainly is. “A mountain shepherd is sitting on a stone one day when a man walks up to him. The man is lost. In French, the man asks for directions, but the shepherd does not speak French. He asks in German, but the shepherd does not speak German. He asks in English, but the shepherd does not speak English. Finally, the lost man goes away frustrated. Later, a friend asks the shepherd why he never studied other languages. Why bother? Answers the shepherd; that man speaks three language and he could not communicate!” So, we were having a great time with our little band.

There was a guy selling little girls Polish folk outfits. They were expensive by even American standards, and Elaine always wanted one for herself when she was D’s age. D asks for the outfit and Elaine decides to get an oversized child’s peasant blouse. D should be able to get a few years wear out of it. Elaine asks me to ask her Mum in this post to find out from Regina about where to get these outfits in the states, and how much do they cost. It is also okay to have Regina read these posts.

In the Cloth Hall there were Americans shopping. Many Americans DO NOT create a good impression abroad. For years, Elaine and I have jokingly pretended to be Canadians when traveling. Even in Florida, we let people think that we are Canadians. Americans abroad are often too loud, pushy, and irritating in a very public way. When they were around, I never opened my mouth. I did softly hum “Oh! Canada!”

We “Canadians” are less judgmental about how other people live and more willing to wait our turn in line. We “Canadians” don’t loudly talk about how awful it is that everything is different and why it can’t be just like home. On a quick side tangent, Elaine and I are aghast at what of American culture is exported to Poland. The worst movies (Starski Y Hutch), the worst music (tuneless gangsta rap), and the worst food (McDonalds, KFC, and Pizza Hut.)

Back to our adventure, we saw a coach with horses and inquired if that was something that we could hire for ride about. It was already booked but the guy with the horses suggested we take the little tramcars instead. (They look like those cars used on Universal tours). Jarrick and Danuta arranged so that most of us would take the tram to the foot of the of Wawel Castle and Jarrick would meet us near the statue of Smok (dragon). This castle is the biggest that I have ever seen and I intend to spend a whole day exploring it with Ross when we come back. However, this day we just saw the outside.

I loved watching the architecture of the Old Town and viewing the castle from the tram. The children also got excited - each and every time we passed a little dog. In their world, little black dogs are king. No. We will not be getting a little black dog.

Jarrick did a great job maneuvering around all of the roads that had been closed to accommodate the marathon. He met us at the statute, which saved us a great deal of walking. This was great since “M” had no energy left and was just cargo by this point.

In about 90 minutes, we stopped for a nice dinner. Jarrik joked that we could stop at McDonalds again. However, I have had enough of that stuff for a while. We stopped at a hotel with a good restaurant. We ordered soup for the children. It is amazing to watch them eat soup. Even the three year-old can eat a big bowl of soup without spilling it. The four adults enjoyed nice conversation as the children ate soup and played with the little toys that we got them at McDonalds.

At this restaurant, the restrooms were easy to find and well marked. That is good since we had many shiko runs. Each child went to the bathroom at least twice. It made the dinner very long, but we were enjoying the rest from the road. We even got dessert from the dessert bar. At this place, you pay 18 Z to get a plate with as many desserts as you can load onto it. The adults had great fun picking these out and enjoying them. Surprisingly, the children wanted none. Still, there were so many shiko runs that I thought that I was going to need the breakfast menu.

We figured that the children would sleep on the ride back to Rybnyk. We figured wrong. Although they were very tired, they did not sleep. It was all to interesting. However, they were well behaved.

Finally, we got to Danuta’s home and - you guessed it - every child needed another shiko run. Not sure that they actually shiko as much as it sounds. I think that there are times when they just want to see a different place. Danuta was very kind to invite us in so the children could make a pit stop. She gave me an excellent mint chocolate bar to dole out to the children. The kids and I loved it.

It was difficult to separate Elaine and Danuta. The two of them had such a great time talking all day. I know that we all would have loved to have visited longer, but it was now very close to the children’s bedtime and we were still 45 minutes from the hotel. Usually at this time of night we are doing the assembly line of baths and PJs. But tonight we were driving through the countryside with “M” getting increasingly goofy. He was punchy really.

Jarrik got us back to the hotel, helped us unload, and get the children inside. Even after we paid him, he lingered chatting nicely with the children.

Before he left, he asked when he would be needed to pick them up from the orphanage. I don’t think that it was just a scheduling question. I suspect that he wants to be part of helping us bring them with us forever. Who wouldn’t? I hope that we see him soon.

I wanted to put the children straight to bed, but Elaine insisted that we follow the regular routine. She was right. I actually only now tell her that she is right in Polish. Takes the sting out of admitting it. (Note from Elaine, Lawrence gets lots of practice with that particular Polish phrase.)

The children were all bathed and in bed by 8:30 (20:30). I think that they were asleep by 8:35. It had been a very long day. We had covered 436 kilometers, shown them sights they had never seen, and hopefully given them a sense of scale about the very long journey home to America.

The children to bed, I went downstairs to get Elaine some of the outstanding ice cream that they have here. We began to collect our thoughts for the day. Late in the evening, I used my mobile phone to track down Ross, tell him about our adventures, and hear about his day. That done, I headed to bed where I slept very well indeed.